A while back, I wrote a big rambling post about all the things I want my boys to know about money by the time they’re grown.
Twenty-four lessons, all the way from “save 20% of every paycheck” to “marry someone with similar money views.” It felt good to get it out of my head.
But a list isn’t a lesson plan. You can’t hand a seven-year-old 24 bullet points and expect anything to stick.
So I’ve distilled it down to the twelve that actually matter most — and turned each one into something you can do with your kid this week, not just something to nod along to.
These are the money lessons I reckon every mum should be teaching, in an order that roughly follows how your kids grow up.
1. Money Is Finite – Even Mum and Dad’s
The very first lesson, and the one that undoes the most damage.
Little kids genuinely believe the eftpos card is magic. If they don’t learn early that money runs out, everything else you teach them later is fighting an uphill battle.
Do this: Next grocery shop, give them $20 cash and let them add up the trolley as you go (or use a calculator). When you hit $20, that’s it — no card bailout. It’s a five-minute lesson that lands harder than any lecture.
2. Saving Isn’t a Punishment, It’s a Superpower
I grew up knowing how to budget for bills, but nobody ever showed me saving was something to get excited about.
I want my kids to feel the opposite — that a healthy savings balance is what buys you options later.
Do this: Start the classic three-jar system (Save, Spend, Give) the day they get their first pocket money. Doesn’t need to be fancy – three jam jars with labels work fine. The habit matters more than the container.
3. Every Dollar Should Have a Job
This is the core idea behind everything I teach on this site – zero-sum budgeting, where nothing sits around unallocated wondering what it’s for.
Kids can learn this exact same principle with $10 of birthday money just as easily as I use it with my whole household budget.
Do this: Before they spend any birthday or pocket money, ask “what’s this dollar’s job?” out loud, together, every time.
Save some, spend some, give some – but every dollar gets assigned before it disappears.
4. Wants vs Needs Is a Skill, Not an Instinct
No kid is born knowing the difference between “I need this” and “I really, really want this.”
That’s a taught skill, and the earlier you start, the less painful the teenage years are.
Do this: Next time they beg for something in a shop, don’t say no on the spot. Say “let’s sleep on it” – my own rule for big purchases, adapted for kids. If they still want it in a week using their own money, let them decide.
5. Debt Comes in Good and Bad Flavours
This one’s more for the tweens and teens, but it’s important they don’t grow up thinking all debt is evil (that’s not true) or that all debt is fine (also not true, as my credit card once taught me the hard way).
Do this: Keep it simple. Good debt can help you build something – a house, an education, a business. Bad debt buys stuff that loses value while you’re still paying it off. Trainers on finance is bad debt. A mortgage on a house in a good area is different.
6. A Job Is More Than a Paycheque
Whether it’s their first babysitting gig or a Saturday job at sixteen, how they show up matters more than what the job is.
I want my boys to treat every job like it’s their own business, not just clock in and out.
Do this: When they get their first paid gig, ask them at dinner what they did to go above and beyond that week – even if it’s just “I stacked the shelves neater than I needed to.” Build the habit of noticing effort early.
7. Save From the Very First Paycheque
If there’s one habit I’d bottle and give my kids, it’s this: start saving a chunk of every single dollar you earn from your very first job.
Young money has decades to grow – it’s the most powerful money you’ll ever have.
Do this: When that first paycheque lands, sit down together and set up an automatic transfer – even just 10–20% – into a savings account the same day it’s paid. Do it before they get used to spending the full amount.
8. Big Purchases Deserve a Cooling-Off Period
Impulse buys are the enemy of every budget, mine included.
Teaching kids to pause before a big spend is one of the cheapest lessons you’ll ever give them — and one of the ones that’ll save them the most money as adults.
Do this: Set a household rule: anything over a set amount (pick a number that suits your family) gets a 24-hour wait before it’s bought, no exceptions, no pushy sales talk overriding it.
9. You Can’t Beat the Market, and That’s Fine
I don’t want my kids trying to pick the next big stock or chase what’s trending online. I want them to understand that slow, boring, automated investing beats most people trying to be clever.
Do this: If they’ve got KiwiSaver contributions from their first job, use that as the real-life example. Show them the balance once a year and explain that it’s growing quietly in the background without them lifting a finger. Boring is the whole point.
10. Give Whatever You Can, Whenever You Can
Generosity is a money skill, too, and it’s easy to skip if you’re only ever talking about saving and spending. I want my boys to know that giving isn’t what’s left over after everything else – it’s a category all its own.
Do this: Make the “give” jar or category non-negotiable, same as save and spend. Let them choose where it goes – a cause they care about, a friend in a tough spot, whatever feels real to them, not something you pick for them.
11. Talk About Money Like It’s Normal, Because It Is
Money secrecy is how a lot of us ended up bad with money in the first place – nobody talked about it, so we all just guessed and got it wrong. I don’t want that for my kids.
Do this: Bring money into everyday conversation without making it A Big Serious Talk. “We’re not getting takeaways this week because we’re saving for the holiday” is worth more than any one-off sit-down lecture.
12. Find a Partner Who Shares Your Money Values
Last one, and it’s the one I’d tell my future daughters-in-law too if I could.
You don’t need to think the same way about money, but you do need to be able to talk about it without it turning into a fight. Life gets exponentially easier once you’re rowing the same direction financially.
Do this: You can’t force this lesson early, but you can model it. Let your kids see you and your partner talk about budgets and goals openly (not just argue about bills). What they see modelled at home is what they’ll expect to be normal in their own relationships.
The Bottom Line
None of these lessons needs a spreadsheet, a course, or a lecture. They need repetition, a bit of real money changing hands, and you being honest about your own money wins and stuff-ups along the way.
If my boys walk away from childhood knowing even half of this list in their bones, not just their heads, I’ll call that a parenting win.
What money lessons are you teaching your kids? I’d love to hear what’s worked in your house.
